Its smart phone apps are the world's most imaginative. Some experts believe the flight from marriage is not merely a rejection of outdated norms and gender roles. For Japanese women today, marriage is the grave of their hard-won careers. More than a quarter of men felt the same way. It could be a long-term state of affairs.

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Across urban Asia, Europe and America, people are marrying later or not at all, birth rates are falling, single-occupant households are on the rise and, in countries where economic recession is worst, young people are living at home. It could be a long-term state of affairs. You end up being a housewife with no independent income. Nor is growing preoccupation with digital technology. Japan's cities are full of conveniences made for one, from stand-up noodle bars to capsule hotels to the ubiquitous konbini convenience stores , with their shelves of individually wrapped rice balls and disposable underwear. Keen to see her nation thrive, she likens her role in these cases to that of the Edo period courtesans, or oiran , who used to initiate samurai sons into the art of erotic pleasure. Secretly, he loved baking cakes, collecting "pink sparkly things" and knitting clothes for his stuffed animals. And the centuries-old belief that the purpose of marriage is to produce children endures. Prime minister Shinzo Abe recently trumpeted long-overdue plans to increase female economic participation by improving conditions and daycare, but Tomita says things would have to improve "dramatically" to compel her to become a working wife and mother. Another study found that a third of people under 30 had never dated at all. Aoyama, 52, is trying to cure what Japan's media calls sekkusu shinai shokogun, or "celibacy syndrome". They don't seem concerned. Most are still too young to have concrete future plans, but projections for them are already laid out. But demographer Nicholas Eberstadt argues that a distinctive set of factors is accelerating these trends in Japan. Her end was not pretty. For their government, "celibacy syndrome" is part of a looming national catastrophe. Fewer babies were born here in than any year on record. Its smart phone apps are the world's most imaginative. The sign outside her building says "Clinic". He defines it as "a heterosexual man for whom relationships and sex are unimportant". Social attitudes don't help. Aoyama says the sexes, especially in Japan's giant cities, are "spiralling away from each other". Satoru Kishino, 31, belongs to a large tribe of men under 40 who are engaging in a kind of passive rebellion against traditional Japanese masculinity. But he does like cooking and cycling, and platonic friendships. I don't miss boyfriends or sex. And that's from a woman who knows a bit about whipping. They don't seem concerned.

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